OH, GOOD GRAVY!

Many of today’s modern conveniences have become staples in my life such as the instant stain remover stick that I carry in my purse.  It does a fantastic job of eradicating the inevitable coffee stains that dribble onto on my clothing during my morning commute to the office or removing an accusatory blot of barbeque sauce after visiting the local rib joint.  Isn’t technology grand?  Modern know-how has come up with a chemical compound that can take away the evidence of our careless consumption of fast food!

I didn’t have an instant spot remover several years ago when I stopped for lunch at the local chicken shack.  The chicken was good, but the restaurant’s gravy was delicious!  This event happened in my younger days (when I actually thought people wanted to know my opinion) so I shared my zeal for the meal with the teenagers working behind the fast-food counter. I extolled poetic admiration about the wonderful gravy while waiting for my beverage refill.  After thanking the young servers I left the restaurant and went to my car.

I placed my drink on the hood of the car and retrieved my keys from my purse to unlock the door, and that’s when I caught sight of it – the big glob of gravy on the front of my shirt!  Yeah, I was taking some of that scrumptious gravy home with me.  I bet those teenagers smirks turned into side-splitting laughter after I left.

I had to go home to change clothes and decided to stop by my sister’s house to tell her the story.  She laughed so hard I thought she might wet her pants (understandable since she had four kids and almost forty at the time).  After that historic day my sister’s family often paid tribute for a delicious meal by enthusiastically mocking me as they proclaimed to their mother, “We really love your gravy!”

It is embarrassing to have egg on one’s face or gravy on one’s shirt.  However, I am now a bit savvier when planning dinner outings.  When we go out to eat with our son and BDIL (beautiful daughter-in-law) I carry a stain stick remover and I ask the waiter for a to-go box after dining – it is so much more couth than carrying a portion of the meal out of the restaurant on the front of my shirt!

COFFEE KLATCH

Don’t you enjoy that first cup of coffee in the morning?  Isn’t it something enjoyable to look forward to each day?   The aroma, the warmth, the exotic taste of roasted beans that came from Kenya or Brazil, it’s all just so wonderful!  A delicious brew is my motivation for waiting in line at the local coffee shop.  My coffee house of choice is an ingenious store that serves charisma in a cup.  The baristas make me feel sophisticated and important as I order my extra hot skinny vanilla latte with foam.  They assure me I have made an excellent decision to purchase my morning beverage with them by providing me with a logo cup that includes witty observations of life from socially aware individuals.

One morning I was in the process of joining the queue winding around the coffee shop and totally unaware that a confrontational woman was waiting for me.  The parking lot has a convoluted traffic pattern and it can become bewildering trying to decide who is in line or who is just trying to get out of there.  I was caught in such a dilemma when not being able to discern the intentions of the lady in a large pickup truck – was she waiting in line or parked?  I chose the latter option and proceeded to take my place in line. 

I rolled my window down in anticipation of placing my order and an angry fifty-something year old woman blasts toward me yelling “Hey, dumb ass, I was in line here!”  I had cut in front of the lady in the pickup and now she was letting me have it for delaying her morning jolt of caffeine, not that she appeared to need any additional fuel!   Instead of asking the woman to stand in front of the car and call me a name again, I chose to quickly apologize and offered to purchase her coffee; but I was talking to her backside as she huffed and puffed into the store.

This would be a good place to bemoan the loss of civility, but I have also experienced the kindness of people at this very same spot.  On the National Day of Prayer the woman in front of me bought my coffee and my BDIL (beautiful daughter-in-law) told me someone had purchased her coffee before, too.  So on that positive note it’s good to remember misunderstandings happen and expressing kindness matters – especially since that coffee drinking “dumb ass” that is cutting you off could be me!